Dean's Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
by HardyBoyz4Eva
Summary: The Shield Slash. Dean's bad day started with Jake 'The Snake' Roberts on Raw 'Old School'... Full list of warnings inside. One-Shot. Please Review!


**Disclaimer:** I don't own anyone, other than Kelly and Cassiopeia.

**Warning(s): **Slash, Threesome, Mpreg, Spoilers for RAW 1-6-14 and SmackDown 1-10-14, etc.

* * *

Roman and Seth paused for air near the locker rooms, wasting the precious bit that filled their burning lungs on a lazy, aching laugh. Shit certainly didn't get any crazier than that.

The two members of the Shield had high-tailed it out of there as soon as Jake 'The Snake' Roberts' little friend had given Dean an up-close-and-personal 'hello'. It only occurred to them later that Dean was deathly afraid of snakes... but he'd been unconscious, right? There was absolutely no way that he could have known there was a snake slowly worming its slippery, slimy body over his chest and neck. Unless he had. The laughing abruptly came to a stop as the two shared an uneasy glance. Seth was about to open his mouth and propose they turn back, when a heavy _smack _met their ears. They turned warily, suddenly face-to-face with Dean Ambrose.

"What the fuck was that out there?!" Never one to waste time on pleasantries, Dean cut right to the chase. His dark glare shot holes through both men.

Roman met Dean's attitude with sarcasm. His voice was low and his tone flat as he answered, "I believe that that was me breaking the little punk-bitch in half, that's what."

"You would've had your ass handed to you just like us, if I hadn't been there to provide the distraction." Dean fired back, face reddening as his blood slowly simmered to a boil. "Don't get all sanctimonious and think you're any better than us."

Roman's eye twitched. Dean was pushing all the wrong buttons today. "And don't put words into my mouth, asshole." He paused for a moment, before continuing, "Now, calm the fuck down. I'm not in the mood to deal with your shit."

"Oh, really?" A sickly-sweet smile came over Dean's face. Roman raised one eyebrow - Dean's mood swings were infamous, but this was downright scary. "Would you like this better?"

Not two seconds after posing the dangerously ambiguous question, his fist flew through the air. It connected with Roman's cheek with an audible _crack _and left a deep, purplish impression of Dean's clumped fingers behind. Roman stumbled back slightly, not having expected the blow, only to gain his footing and return with an equally-vicious right hook of his own. Blood frothed over Dean's lip and, after hurriedly wiping it off on the back of his hand, pounced. This time, however, Roman was prepared. Reversing the dirty blond's momentum, he took him down to the hard tile floor with what seemed to be a modified spear.

Dean, never missing a beat, started to flail frantically from his position beneath Roman. It was a throwback to his days as a submissive, days that were not often looked back upon fondly. He started to throw punches wildly, some so wide one had to wonder if it was ever intended to strike his target at all. Roman simply bunched a hand in the front of Dean's shirt and pressed his shoulders down into the floor, adjusting his weight in a silent warning. But though it was well-known who would win in a fight between the two of them, Dean fancied it an uphill battle that he was he'll-bent on winning. Because losing simply wasn't an option.

"Guys... seriously, this is ridiculous. One of you is going to get really -," Seth, who had been mumbling this under his breath as he moved to intervene, stopped suddenly as Dean's fist collided with the side of his face, "hurt."

"Oh, God, Sethie... I... I..." Dean scampered out from underneath Roman and made for Seth, but Seth quickly moved away. "I..."

Seth forced a smile, but it was difficult with the way his cheek was swelling. "I know, I know. You didn't mean it, right? Of course you didn't." This was followed by a weak sniffle.

Roman eyed the shiner quickly forming on Seth's cheek, before whistling crudely. "Smooth move, Casanova."

"Shut up, Roman. You're commentary isn't helping." But it was pointless - by this point, the tears were rolling freely down Seth's cheeks, and his attempts to stifle his almost inaudible sobs made them all the more obvious. "Seth, I am so sorry. Really."

"You know, for some reason, I don't believe you." Seth forced out between hicupping sobs.

At that, Dean snapped again. "What? Don't tell me you think that I'd actually hit you on purpose!" And then, as if to add salt into the wound, "You can't possibly be that stupid."

Seth's eyes flashed dangerously, and in the blink of an eye, he'd raised his right hand and landed an open-palm swat on Dean's cheek. The redness of his cheek was beautiful next to his bloody lip. "Go rot in Hell, bastard."

Seth ran off without another word, and Roman really couldn't blame him. This storyline had started to take its toll on him, especially with Kelly constantly inquiring as to whether or not they were gonna break up and 'share her' like Bray sometimes had to do with Cassiopeia. As of late, it seemed like even the smallest of things - like a poorly executed punch, or some words said in anger - were all it took to send him into fits of tears. And while Dean did have a valid point (they really shouldn't have just left him there, what with his fear of snakes and all), he had no right to take it out on Seth in the way that he had. Now, he could deal with the consequences.

"You done now?" Roman asked cautiously, if not a tad angrily. Dean nodded, looking down at the floor. "I suggest you take a little walk and cool down before coming back to the hotel. I don't want you freaking out Kelly."

"Yeah, that's probably a good idea." For the first time, Dean could taste blood in his mouth. It was disgusting.

"Now, if you'll excuse me," he rose slowly, brushing himself off, "I'm going to go find Seth."

* * *

Dean stood in front of the mirror, offering his reflection a critical glance. Roman had certainly done a number on him. His lower lip had been bust open, but now, as he bit down on a cold, wet paper towel, it seemed as if the flow of blood had been staunched somewhat. But there wasn't anything he could do about his cheek. Even if only fifteen minutes had passed since that dreadful encounter in the hallway, the bruise had settled in dark, purple, and angry. He knew that he deserved it... but that didn't make it hurt any less. And to think, today had started out so well, too...

It was this stupid storyline that was driving a wedge between them. Dean knew that Roman didn't really think that he was better than them, but the idea had been supplanted so many times, it had just come out. And Seth... Dean balled his hands into fists and smashed them into the mirror, pressing his forehead into the mirror. He felt sick to his stomach at the memory of what had happened to Seth, what he had said to him, but at the same time, couldn't help but think everything could have been avoided if Seth had just let him and Roman beat the holy hell out of each other.

Lazily, he rubbed a hand over his aching rib cage. While he _had_ been there to provide the distraction, it had certainly come at a terribly painful price. Phil's attack had been centered at his ribs, and when he'd fallen, he'd taken the brunt of it heavily in his back. He doubted that any of his ribs were broken, more likely badly bruised, but the pain was practically unbearable now and all he wanted to do was go back to the hotel room and curl up into a nice, neat little ball and die... maybe not even in that order. Instead, he slowly made his way out of the bathroom, grabbed his things, and made his way toward the car - stopping only when he heard voices...

"I hate him!" That was definitely Seth. Even with the frantic display of emotions in his voice, Dean would know his submissive's voice _anywhere_. "All he ever does is hurt me..." this declaration was little more than a painful whine, and as the voices came closer, Dean could see that Seth was rubbing his cheek.

Roman's big hand lay on one of Seth's slightly smaller shoulders, and he offered a consoling, "You don't have to go back there, okay? If that bastard lays another hand on you, I'll twist him into a human pretzel." The sentiment was creepily romantic, but it worked to earn a chuckle out of Seth.

"What are we going to do then, if we don't go back?" Seth's tone was teasing. Dean felt his heart sink. Were they talking about him?

Roman's next words just about crushed the leader of the Shield, when he said, almost dismissively, "We'll just find somebody else."

For the first time since he could remember, Dean found himself forcing back tears. He was _certain_ that the topic of their conversation was about him now. Was that all that he was to them? Some cheap, free love that could easily be replaced? Well, he wouldn't just stand-by and let them walk-all-over him like that. Dean had never been one to wait to be reactive... he was the one that had started their little threesome, he was the one that would end it. Storming out of the locker room, and practically giving Seth a heart attack in the process, he leveled both men with as dark a look as he could muster.

"I'm leaving." He boldly proclaimed, being as ambiguous as the other two men had been earlier.

"What?" Seth asked, startled. All teasing had left his voice and his face looked pained, serious.

"It's clear where your loyalties lie, and it's not with me." He nodded to Seth, to Roman. "I'm not one to stick around and stay where I'm not wanted."

He was making Seth cry again, and Dean wondered how long it would be before Roman contorted him into that human pretzel. Surprisingly, however, Roman seemed just as dumbfounded as Seth - though not as emotional. "What the hell are you talking about, Dean? Did I hit you too hard on the head earlier?"

"Very funny." Dean even managed to force out a choked laugh, though it was bitter and ugly-sounding. "Making jokes, up until the very end..." the tears were burning at his eyes once again. "I'm leaving... so that I cannot hurt the two of you any more."

Realization dawned in Seth's eyes and he absently raised a hand to stroke his throbbing cheek, "But you _don't_ hurt us! This," here, he motioned to his cheek, "This was only an accident... and it was _our_ fault... we never should have left you out there!" The tears had returned full-force now. "P-Please... don't leave, Dean."

Roman was a little less dramatic, offering a curt, "You hurt me, I hurt you back. That's the way it's always been." He shrugged.

"Not anymore." Dean assured, his tone dark. "When you return to the hotel room, my stuff will be gone. You won't have to worry about me hurting you ever again."

Seth was about to make a rebuttal, but Dean had already turned and was walking away. The look of absolute heartbreak and betrayal that came over Seth's face was hard to erase from one's mind. Seth promptly turned and buried his face in Roman's tactical vest, the abrasive material not helping his already aching face at all. Roman wrapped an arm around his shoulders and patted his back in an affectionate, yet awkward, way. It really seemed like Seth's greatest fears about this storyline were coming to fruition. That, or Dean was just having a really sucky day and taking it out on everyone around him.

"M-Make him come back, Roman!" Seth sobbed into the bigger man's vest, practically holding on for dear life.

Roman continued to pat his back, realizing belatedly that the tactical vest absorbed water... "We'll go back to the hotel room and talk to him, okay? He's not going anywhere, I promise." And Seth nodded, still holding tight to Roman. After all, Roman had never made a promise that he couldn't keep.

* * *

First things first, however, they had to deal with Kelly. Curt had landed the lucky job of babysitting both Kelly and Cassiopeia for the night, since he didn't have a match. From the loud music blaring from inside the locker room in question, however, it was clear that the two seven-year-olds had been keeping him busy. Roman tried the door, found that it was open, and they entered inside. _Follow the Leader_ from Just Dance 2014 was being projected up onto one of the walls, and the two girls were happily dancing away. From the screen, it was clear that there had once been a third player... but it looked like he had caved into exhaustion.

Seth went over to talk with Kelly, while Roman pulled Curt aside. While the two were, admittedly, very different, they'd come to form a sort of mutual respect for one another since their children started playing together. "What is it?" Curt asked, noticing the dark, tired look on Roman's face.

"Look, I need you to do me a huge favor. I wouldn't ask unless it was really important." Roman started.

"Of course." Curt nodded. He offered a quick glance back at Cassie, who was still rocking out to the last refrain of the song.

"Is there any possible way that Kelly can stay with you tonight?" Roman asked. "Dean... well..." Roman rubbed the back of his neck, trying to find a delicate way to put it. "Dean's not having the best day, and he accidentally wacked Seth in the face, and now he's gone completely out of his head. We just need to calm him down."

"I completely understand." Curt quickly assured. "And she's more than welcome to stay with us. Bray's always happy when there's something else to curb Cassie's seemingly endless energy." They shared a quick, seemingly pained laugh. "No worries, okay? Kelly's always welcome here."

"Thanks. You don't know how much this means to us." And it said a lot that Roman was willing to confide that information with Curt.

"Like I said, no worries. I completely understand." Curt said. "Especially about the snake thing... ick!" An involuntary shiver chased down his spine.

It seemed as if Seth had just gotten done giving Kelly the good news about her sleepover, because the little girl was running across the room, cheering loudly with her arms raised high in the air. Once she reached Cassie, she promptly attacked the slightly bigger girl, causing both of them to fall over. Both watched in wide-eyed wonder as they giggled and rolled all over the floor. They were so adorable together... for a moment, it was enough to forget the fight that they had just had with Dean. But that sensation was fleeting. Slowly, Seth made his way back over to Roman.

"Bye, Kelly. Have fun!" Seth waved to her. Kelly flashed a brilliant smile in return.

"Bye Mommy, bye Daddy!" And then, not even realizing that anything was out of the ordinary, she went back to rough-housing with Cassie.

* * *

Dean was, fortunately, still packing his things upon their return. Seth and Roman shared a tentative look as they watched Dean slowly reminisce over many fond memories that always traveled with them... Kelly's first picture, her first birthday, their collection from their first collective date, the collection from when Dean and Roman had both staked their claim on Seth... Dean, ever the closet romantic, was having a hard time parting with these memories. And if Roman and Seth got their way, he'd never have to.

"Dean?" Seth's tentative, shaky voice broke the silence. Dean almost jumped out of his skin as he slowly turned to face the other two men. "Can we talk?"

"Well, I guess you caught me. I didn't hold up my end of the promise very well, now did I? But no matter. I won't be your problem much longer." Dean assured sadly.

"I'm guessing you heard our conversation in the hallway then, huh?" Dean nodded, but didn't look up, clearly not pleased that this conversation was continuing. "But I'd be willing to bet decent money on the idea that you didn't hear all of it."

"What more was there to hear? Was I honestly supposed to stand by and listen to you two bash me some more?" He hissed.

Now, it was Roman's turn to intervene. "We were talking about the trainer, Dean."

An awkward silence promptly followed, to which Dean answered with a soft, somewhat hesitant, "What?"

"Seth wasn't feeling well after... well, you know... so I took him down to the trainer. Except the idiot manhandled him and made him feel about ten times worse then he already did." Roman explained.

But Dean, who wasn't thinking clearly, promptly responded with, "I hit him hard enough to send him to the trainer." Once again, he sounded near tears.

This time, Seth shook his head. "No, you idiot... I'm pregnant." A pause, "it's yours."

Dean simply blinked for several minutes, dumbfounded. Seth was pregnant. Seth was pregnant with his baby. The dirty blond was pretty sure that he'd never felt a more peculiar mix of emotions in his life - anxiousness, self-directed anger, amazement, wonder, self-directed sadness, joy, and, most prevalent of all, love. And to think, fifteen minutes ago, he believed that he would be leaving because it would be best for everybody. In truth, that decision just would have made everyone that much more miserable. A baby... They were going to have another baby!

Too overwhelmed with excitement to contain it all to himself, he whisked Seth up into his arms and swung him around, squeezing him as tight as he dared. Seth was laughing, truly laughing, and Dean realized that it was the most beautiful sound that he had heard all day. After several moments, he placed Seth back down onto the ground and, pulling him close, crashed their lips together in a violently romantic , extremely apologetic kiss. Seth returned it full-force, accepting everything that Dean had to offer and giving just as good as he got.

When they finally drew back for air, Dean spoke to both his lovers. "I'm sorry about how pissy I've been today, guys. Roman - you really deserved that victory, I shouldn't have chewed you out like that for it."

Roman shrugged dismissively, but Dean could see in his eyes that he was thankful for the apology. "We all have bad days sometimes."

"And Seth, I am so, so sorry that I hit you. It was a total accident, but that doesn't make it any better. Especially now that I know about the baby..." He looked incredibly ashamed of his actions.

Seth raised his hands, shaking his head. "No worries, man. It was an accident, like you said, and everything's fine." Then, "We're just sorry we left you out there with that snake."

Dean shivered. He could still feel that slimy thing slithering all over him. "Let's not talk about the snake, hmm?"

Dean didn't unpack the suitcase, which was momentarily disconcerting to his two lovers. But when he slipped it underneath the bed, forgotten, they began to breathe a bit easier. Quickly stripping out of their ring gear, they all collapsed onto the bed. The bed was scarcely large enough to hold one of them, let alone three, but they somehow made it work... They always did. Seth cuddled up between Dean and Roman, resting his head on Roman's broad chest and feeling Dean's protective arms slip around his still-flat midsection. Not a bad ending to a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.


End file.
